What exactly does one say when they meet a famous person? What could you possibly say that would make you memorable? Make you appear smart and suave? Something that would differentiate you from the thousands of other shmucks that famous people meet every year?

Usually I choke. I mumble something inaudible or lame. I snort or giggle, like I usually do when I'm nervous. I have nothing interesting to say at all. 

Normally, I'm full of witty remarks. They fly off my tongue at a moments notice. I consider myself funny and smart, but when I'm around someone whom I've admired for years, I become a lame dork.

I once asked a band to sign my chest. Not very original, nor very cool, as they were all married. I once could barely utter my name when asked by a singer I had the HUGEST crush on. I just stood there, grinning like an idiot. I honestly could not form a coherent sentence.

I hope I'm not the only one to suffer this phenomenon. Not that it probably matters anyway. Most stars have done this so many times in so many cities they are literally on auto-pilot. They usually have this glazed-over faraway look in their eyes. 

Nowadays, I'm usually working so I can maintain an air of aloofness. I can skitter around taking photos of actual winners, while pretending not to be the least bit interested in whomever we are meeting. When in reality, I'm texting everyone I know about who I'm sitting in the same room with. Could I possibly be any nerdier? (Don't answer that.)

So my dilemma is meeting Little Steven. You may have heard of him. He plays with Bruce Springsteen. He has his own nationally syndicated radio program, something about an underground garage. He played a part on some small HBO show, you might have heard of it, "The Soprano's." He's coming to town this Friday and I get to be part of the meet and greet.

This is where I need your help, people. What can I say to this man that he hasn't heard before? What will make me memorable? Smart? Attractive? Oh, please people! Give me some ideas!

Should I ask him what it's like to be program director of two Sirius Satellite Radio programs, one being hosted by Joan Jett? Should I ask him what it's like to work along side his real-life wife, Maureen, who also portrays his wife on the TV show? Should I comment on his hairy chest? His headgear?

Should I just smile and shake his hand and say, "Thank you for doing this for our station. We really appreciate it." Should I just smile and shake his hand? Maybe just smile?

Maybe I should wear a low-cut shirt? No, too common.

If you feel that you might be able to help me with my dilemma in any way, please email me immediately, alinford@entercom.com. Or, take me aside at the pre-concert party and give me some good advice. 

Thank you in advance.