I'm not talking about falling down in front of people (like I often do, sober even) or having toilet paper stuck to your shoe or your skirt tucked up into your thong so your ass is hanging out or accidently passing gas loudly on a date (all of the above unfortunately apply to me).
I'm talking about sending out the wrong information to thousands and thousands of people and then having pissed off clients and account executives glaring daggers at your face. And then having your boss refer to it as the "botched email."
I did it yesterday. In fact, I do it all the time. I screw up for everyone to see.
So KGON sends out email 'blasts' to our thousands-strong KGON Workforce Database. We send them out about twice a month. Last week, it was about the Police and this week it was about Mark Knopfler. Earlier this month, it was about Rush. You get the picture.
DISCLAIMER: These are not solicitory emails and we sell no personal information to any of those horrible individuals who call you at dinnertime and ask you if you want to attend a timeshare seminar or ask you if you want to switch car insurance. We keep a database solely to offer you good people concert info and ticket pre-sale info. Amen.
We usually have little tidbits about pre-sales, upcoming concerts, any interesting station news, funny little videos and then usually some client based advertising with a logo and whatever pertinent information they are paying us to send out to the public. For example, last week it was a Toyota and free lift tickets and this week, it was info about our upcoming $9 dollar ski day. And that's where I got my wires crossed.
I go through all my paperwork, I get all my details and info, and then I start putting together the blast. It usually takes a little bit of work to get it all right: pictures in place, details correct. I send it to my boss to proof.
No typos.
I send it to the account people. No typos. Looks good.
I sit in LK's office and we go over it together. No typos. Looks good. You can sense we have a little thing about typos (see Mr. Burns and the Spellchecker) and we are extra careful about proofreading.
LK looks at me. "Are we ready? Should we send it? Are you sure? 100%?"
"Yes." I confidently say.
We send.
Thirty seconds later, an account person is running pell-mell down the hall, the look of death on her face, tears in her eyes. This is, after all, her livelihood. I follow, knowing the destination is LK's office. I cringe.
"The blast is wrong. WRONG! It's Mt. Hood Ski Bowl," she pants, "Not Meadows! IT"S SKI BOWL!"
I freeze. Wow. No typos but I didn't get the event location correct. Hmmm. That could pose a small problem, couldn't it?
We piece together how I could have gotten it wrong. It really doesn't matter. Bottom line. I messed up. And I sent it to THOUSANDS of people. Please shoot me.
So, if you got the email blast yesterday, please be advised that the correct location of the $9 dollar ski day on Sunday, March 2nd, is Mt. Hood SKI BOWL. Not the other one. Interestingly, the coupon that you need to print out and bring with you for your lift ticket is correct- it says Ski Bowl. I was obviously not in charge of the coupon.
And be prepared to get another 'correction' blast next week. It will say something along the lines of "Amy Linford is a dundering idiot and should never cut and paste. Ever. From anything. Ever."
And she should never send out the wrong information to thousand of people. Ever.
And then, to top it all off, today I accidently deleted three of our weekend features from our 'on air' tab on the website. If you were looking for The Beatle Years, The Superstar Concert Series or Uncle Joe Benson's thingy, I will have them back up soon. Sorry Bonnie.
I can hardly wait to catch Mr. Burns lurking by my desk, waiting to ask me what the hell I'm doing. He will never find me because I run and hide in the girls bathroom every time I see him in the hallway. I will probably trip and fall on the way. Or come out with tp stuck to my high heels.
