Does this Hootie requester even listen to KGON? And damn Rolling Stone for actually putting them on the cover!
So before I totally rip on this dork, I have been sifting through the 500 or so emails from our loyal listeners and checking out people's lists. They are all pretty awesome. I even put my own up there, you can see for yourself what my top 5 songs are. (That link will take you to the webpage where all of our lists are posted, including our very own Program Director. I am adding to this daily so keep checking.)
Don't think of this as a list where you must compile your most favorite top 5 songs of all freakin time! I mean, who can come up with that list? I had to beg Shannon to come up with 5 songs that I could put on the website and he kept changing his picks and making very sure I was aware that these were in "no particular order." (And then he thought his picture made him look fat and asked me to change the songs and the order, like, 3 times. We ended up not posting Shannon's Secret Top 5 songs because he was being too fussy!) But just like Shan said, it's just 5 songs you would really like to hear as part of our marathon.
And let us know what your favorite KGON artist of all time is too. Led Zeppelin is by far the most requested in that category, although Iris Harrison has gotten quite a large number of votes as well. And don't just email us if you're bored and have nothing else to do- there is a huge grand prize at the end of this A To Z Marathon, people. HUGE! Everyone who sends us their song picks is entered to win a 8 Gig iPod Nano AND a $500 dollar gift certificate to Music Millennium! We will even give your our A To Z list so you can load up your new iPod with great classic rock songs. We will randomly pick the winner from all email entries at the end of the marathon. You don't have to have your list and picture featured on the website, just send us an email and you are entered. I can only feature so many lists; our webpage would end up being long enough to wrap around the planet. Or my ass, which is currently the size of Africa. (God, I sound like Shannon!)
Now, between you and me, I find this grand prize quite puzzling. If a person has an iPod, what do they buy at a music store? Music Millennium happens to be the coolest record store on the planet and Terry Currier happens to be the coolest, most down to earth person in the music business in Portland. (I've met him a few times, the first time at the Rod Stewart concert last March. He probably has no idea who I am but it's nice to name drop.) You could get alot of cool CD's at MM that you can then upload them onto your new iPod? I guess I thought most people go to iTunes to purchase their music, or perhaps some obscure Russian website where you can get songs for free. (Disclaimer- I neither endorse nor recommend those dastardly free music, file-sharing websites. Think of the money that you are essentially stealing from fat, rich record company execs- not to mention those poor, starving artists like Britney effing Spears.)
But $500 bucks for whatever you want at MM? That's pretty heavenly. And, the brand new 8 Gig iPod (it's really cool- I just bought it. It's silver and really small. It's locked up in LK's office) is awesome. I was gonna try and steal it and say I lost it but I don't wish to get fired at this time.
Now, back to the tool who sent in Hootie and the Blowfish for his top 5 pick. Are you kidding? This person is from the east coast and therefore may not listen to KGON on a regular basis. Maybe he--and I'm only calling him a 'he' because it's less letters to type than 'she' and I'm trying to keep this person androgynous for the sake of privacy- although he does deserve to be publicly ridiculed for this request-- is unaware of what "classic rock" means. Classic rock, kind sir, is rock and roll from the likes of The Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, The Doors, Tom Petty, and Bruce Springsteen- just to name a few. Hootie and the Blowfish does not, in any way, shape or form, constitute classic rock. Why don't you go ahead and request Rick Astley or Avril Lavign? Maybe Billy Ocean? Love of the creator!
So people, go ahead and send us your top 5 songs for A to Z. I would love to see how many more Zeppelin fans are out there and the delicious mix of songs you all come up with. If Bob Seger is your favorite artist, feel free to send in 5 Bob songs. That's totally cool. You can even pick the deepest, most obsure cuts you can think of. Like "Seeing Things" by the Black Crowes, my TOTAL FAVORITE, or "Sylvia's Mother" by Dr. Hook. I can't guarantee that we will play them, or that we even have them, but send them in anyway. The least that will happen is I will print out your list and pass it around the office so we can all laugh at you. I might even make fun of you on this page, but that will only happen if you request Snoop Dog. Or Milli Vannili. In that case, you deserve it.
Friday Morning Backlash
Wait, I was just told I should probably be a little bit nicer to people who take the time to send us their top 5 songs picks. In that case, I will not publicly ridicule you or laugh at you because you prefer Hootie to Jimi. If you would like to be publicly ridiculed, or know someone who should be, let me know: alinford@entercom.com.
And then my sister texts me at lunch today, "Before u hammer anymore on the guy who like Hootie, let me tell u a little story. Back in 6th grade, when Michael Jackson was big, I made the mistake of calling KGON and asking them to play "Beat It." The person who answered the phone was so mean to me I almost cried. KGON was the only radio station I could find in the phone book. Sometimes bad things happen to good people." We have alot of sensitive stories like that from our childhood. I am positive that if you called today and requested Beat It, Iris would be very sweet as she politely declined the request. And then we would laugh about you in the studio.
